i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
