we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
