i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
