a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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