help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I want to have your abortion
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
