Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
