I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
i barfeds in our rink
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
