The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
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