youre lurking in front of me
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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