Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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