Having a random hookup so left but love u
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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