Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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