I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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