What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
