Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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