Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
vagina is talking i cant
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
