if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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