I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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