I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Randomize