The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Randomize
