google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Send help, water and tortillas.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Randomize
