thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
