My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I'm gonna fight the coyote
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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