My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
sex in a hospital.. check
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Randomize
