You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
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