didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
