Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Randomize
