the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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