I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Randomize
