If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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