No awkward lesbian experiences without me
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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