Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

Hey kate, how is it?

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.

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(519): View more from Ontario

Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.

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(757): View more from Virginia

I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.

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(654): View more from

And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.

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(309): View more from Illinois

Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.

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(518): View more from New York

Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos

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(740): View more from Ohio

besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?

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(858): View more from California

Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.

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(702): View more from Nevada

This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom

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