Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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