the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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