There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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