am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Randomize