i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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