So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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