I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Randomize
