Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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