And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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