he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
