you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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