I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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