Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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