I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Randomize