I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize