i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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