Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
