What did we do last night that was yellow?
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
